Saturday, August 20, 2005

Dealing With a Loss

Yesterday my son received notice that one of his dearest childhood friends took his own life recently. My son and Levi had had not seen each other for several years, but when they lived close to each other, they were inseparable. The details of the death are few. My mother snail mailed the obituary and the story printed in her small town paper to my son and we received it yesterday. My son was visibly upset, but he is a soldier and will not openly grieve. As I went in his room to put away some laundry, I noticed he had the items his grandmother mailed to him on his desk along with an elementary school yearbook open to Levi's picture. Beside his name, my son scribbled, "RIP, bro." I hurt for him. I can because when I was in my middle 20's, one of my childhood friends took his own life in a similar manner. I grieve to this day over him. He was a core part of our group of friends. He is greatly missed. I will try to comfort my son, but I am sure he will not accept it. He does not handle death very well. Seems odd that a soldier would have trouble dealing in death, since he may be called to be a "death dealer" at some point, but there is a time for everything.

I also wanted to mention that my Christian Sister, AAA, is dealing with some medical issues and is not sure what is causing them. I have been praying for her (and so has my wife) and have hope God will heal her. If for some reason she is not healed, then I pray that God will use this time to better his kingdom. That is why we are here. This body means nothing. It is just a temporary home for our spirit until we are called back to God.

On a lighter note, my son has purchased his first car (he has owned one before, but he bought it from us, so that does not really count). He is now the proud owner of a 1995 Mazda Millenia. While far from a perfect car, it is in good shape over all. It needs a few things (tires, a headlight, paint job, new battery, etc) it runs well.

1 comment:

Malori said...

I really do not know how to begin. As I read this, tears came to my eyes. With having something like that happen in our family, I am all too familiar with the emotional hurt. When my uncle died after attempting to take his own life, I suffered tremendously. It is one of those horrible things that you think could happen to "anyone but me." Please tell him that I send my deepest condolences and that I wish I could do something to take away the pain. Please also tell him that it does no good to hold your feelings inside yourself. I did, and I made a mistake. It creates more problems that it helps. Throughout the whole ordeal, I barely cried and I never talked about my feelings, and that probably seemed very unusual for me because I become emotional very easily. However, it is not easy to come to terms with a thing like this or to even believe it really happened. One just wishes it were all a dream...but it's not. I would e-mail him, but as his father it would probably be best for you to tell him all this. But tell him if he ever needs someone to talk to, I would be more than happy to listen, since I have had to deal with the same thing. I am so sorry that this would have to happen to one of my friends. However, God brings something good out of every evil ("When the Lord closes a door, somehow He opens a window"), and I pray that your son and his friend's family will be comforted by Him.