Monday, June 24, 2013

All Hail the Class of 1983

On June 22 and 23 of 2013, I attended my 30th year high school reunion.  I missed our 25th due to scheduling issues (I live about 1200 miles away from my hometown nd it was finalized only two weeks before the event) and when this one was announced I had mixed feelings about attending.  I assumed that many of the people that came to the 25th reunion would not make the 30th, but my wife encouraged me to go.  I am glad she did.  It was memorable.

The reunion dinner/mixer was held at an establishment owned by one of my classmates (20 miles away in another county) and it was coordinated by a few of the others.  The following day a family picnic was held in a park very close to my mother's house, again coordinated by a few of my classmates.  While I was hungry before I went to both events, I did not go for the food.  I wanted to reconnect with a few of the people I had lost contact with  but still remembered.  With the internet age you would think it would be easy to find someone you went to school with but it turns out that many people don't use social media and some did not even have/use e-mail.

There were a few surprises at each event.  A few people I did not expect to attend showed up and then some people whom I expected to see did not attend.  One of the best surprises was being able to see someone whom I have known since I was TWO but had not communicated with much since graduation.  I had her e-mail but she really did not make an effort to keep in touch, or so it seemed.  After Friday night I understood some of her reluctance to stay connected.  It is a bit of an ironic story that I will try to tell later.  I would have liked to pick her brain more but time would not allow for that.  I am having a great deal of trouble processing most of what she said and reconciling that with her current situation.

One of the other surprises was seeing someone whom I had completely forgotten about.  The last time I saw her was 20 years ago at the 10 year reunion and that was a pretty brief conversation.  She hadn't changed  much since then.  She still was polite and soft spoken, although when she wanted something done, she had a way of making it happen.  I met and spoke at length with her husband who was in a similar line of work that I am.  They attended both functions and while I did not talk to either of them much the second day, we did chat a bit.

A few of the coordinators were people that I had lost contact with, but still followed on Facebook.  They had not changed all that much and were just as polite and giving as they were 30 years ago when I had them in class.  A few of them were ones that I helped through English (which is ironic since my grammar is atrocious),  but at least they passed the class.

I reconnected with a guy I worked with right out of high school. We spent a good part of Sunday chatting. He was always polite even though our boss was not the most pleasant person on the planet. He works for a turbine engine manufacturer, which is interesting to me because a few other people in my graduating class work in the aerotech industry as well, bit in different parts of the US.

I saw a lot of people that I did not really associate with in high school for various reasons and most of them did not make any attempt at saying high.  It may have been that they did not know my name and just did not want to appear foolish.  Maybe I was still beneath them on the social ladder.

I was able to estimate that about 40-50 percent of our graduating class moved out of state at some point after graduation.  WV is a rather depressed state to live in, generally speaking, and I am sure that the lure of greener pastures enticed them to move away.  With that in mind I found it interesting that most of them said if they could do their job from anywhere, they would move back to WV.  At least one person who can work from anywhere (like their spouse can) stated they only reason they stay where they are is because of their spouse.  That was pretty enlightening.

There was something I noticed and after thinking about it, it must be a female thing.  I had at least 5 people tell me they recognized me the minute they saw me that first night.  I thought that was kinda odd since I have beard and have lost a lot of hair and I don't think I look anything like I used to.  My weight is a bit more (+20 lbs) than it was when I graduated but it does not look bad on my frame.  I was told that people recognized me because of my eyes.  I have had, since I have been little, pale blue-gray eyes.  They are not bright blue, not deep blue, not pale blue, but a pale blue-gray.  People have always commented (okay, moth females) on my eyes.  I remember once when I was 10 or so an older girl, maybe 14, told me I had the nicest eyes she had ever seen on a boy.  I had actually forgotten about that until Friday night.  I guess it kind of felt good.

One other surprising comment that was made to me was from a woman I only had one class with that I can remember and that was drivers ed.  She came over to me and asked me how I had been and then said she was just talking to a couple other people we graduated with about, "I wonder what ever happened to..." then named 3-5 people.  Mine was one of the names she was curious about.  One of the other names on her list was also on mine, so we traded info but we both had the same data so it really did not help either once of us.  Luckily one of our former classmates knows someone who probably can help.  She promised to keep us in the loop.

Most of the females I was friends with in high school brought their spouses (almost all of them were married) and I made every effort to talk to then when their wives wandered off to hug and old friend (speaking of hugs, I was hugged so much that night it almost became an expected form of greeting).  I think everyone is aware that a spouse at a high school or college reunion is doomed to hold purses, drinks and take pictures most of the night.  I wanted to at least give the husbands of my classmates someone to talk to.

I spoke with the event coordinators and they were a bit disappointed at the number of people who either blew off the event or just did not want to come.  There was also a large number of people who just could not be located.  The team used all of their Google-fu but nothing turned up.  I told them that once they sanitized the list I would help if I could.

Overall we had about 60 of our 221 graduates attend the functions.  It was not a stellar turn out but for me it was worth the drive.  I may have not seen everyone I wanted to but I saw many that I had not expected and that made it worthwhile.  A lot of what I saw and heard did not surprise me but there were things that did.